Before I go to bed you are the last thing that leaves my bed, and in the morning you are the first thing that i breathe in. I don't even think we''re right for each other. Perhaps this is my masochistic obsession. My christian cross to bear, The only person that I've liked in years does like me back in my fashion. Which is a blessing I suppose. Because I'd only fuck it up like I always do. My heart has entered the dismal shadowlands of winter. Maybe this is just the end of the storm. I really do hope these feelings fade. Your a good friend and thats what I need right now, thats what you need right now. so what if every tiime I see yourface, sweet amphetemines begin to course through my vains and I swim in your dizzying scent. Your mannerisms, your flesh, your mind. your skill, your pencil, your paint brush. I wish to be the canvas that you paint in every day. The brush that you finger, the stroke that you move.
But no,
we cannot
I will not ruin another relationship.
not this time...
I will run...
run away from this feeling in my body, that shakes the frame of my bones.
calm this fire in my belly, with yet another morning theft.
But I wan't you
and you know it...
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